Miscellaneous

Hello everyone hope you are finding some good information and helpful tips so far in the grief process you are going through. I know it is a lot of information to absorb while still processing your loss, just know each week becomes a little better then the months start flying by, but your grief is always there even if it is in the background, it is still with you.

I’m really not sure at which point it leaves you or maybe just quietly stays with you always. I’m not quite to my 3rd year in my loss, I know it has lessened but always is there and pops up at the smallest memory and swallows me whole. Sometimes I just let it take me other times I try to calm the beast. If you have experienced this, you know what I am talking about.

Some techniques I found that are helpful are:

  1. Writing in my journal about what happened what triggered the emotional feeling, and how did I cope with this when it happened.
  2. Try to envision why this triggered the emotion – was it a happy memory, a day-to-day type of chore memory, then think back on that moment in time. For example: my son mows my grass for me this particular day when he finished, he sat on the bench outside with me. I just stared at him, and a tear started to flow he had no clue what happened but after my husband mowed the lawn, he always sat on the bench next to me it just brought back a special memory. Of how my life use to be in the summer.

There are a million and one memories that will hit you given the event or place and time or a chore you are doing could even be a smell that can trigger a sense of nearness. These are not easy to dismiss but maybe just know this might be a sign they are with us and watching over us.

Now I am not going to get into a debate on what happens when someone passes that is everyone’s right to believe what you believe. But I still feel the person/soul/spirit is near at certain times. Maybe it is wishful thinking but whatever it is when it is there it can make you smile with warm thoughts.

I know I was going to go over how to deal with things that come up repair wise in your life or things you are not used to doing but I felt a little melancholy today and thought this would be a good subject to touch on in this blog.

Please leave me a comment if you had any experiences of your own.

Just remember this is your grief how you handle situations that come up are totally yours and will be different for everyone.

The chaos never seems to be far away on any given day, and depending on our mood that day it will depend on how you can best process your emotions. Feel what you feel don’t let anyone ask why you are still grieving they don’t understand.

Remember there is no set time limit on your grief. the important thing to remember is you take each step as it comes to get around that mountain the best you can for you and when you reach the other side you will have grown emotionally stronger and found a new YOU! Please just don’t get stuck at the beginning and never make the journey of a thousand miles. To come back from chaos you must start at the front of the mountain of grief or just start taking that first step of your thousand miles around the mountain. We can do this.